I’m glad you were able to eat out and sit for a little bit. Yay! I’m sorry the appointment was difficult. 🙁 I’m glad that you could get a break from it instead of suffering through a longer one though. I too have lived in a number of places. I grew up on military bases so we bounced around a bit. Hawaii, Virginia, California, Maryland, and now I live with my husband and 3 adorable cats in Missouri. My little brother recently moved to Texas. Just outside of Austin, I believe. He loves it there and says everyone is so nice. 🙂
Oh my word, I completely understand the ‘Well, all that living I was hoping to do as I got older isn’t going to work out as well as I hoped’ feeling. That one can sting a little bit more than others. There can already be a sense of loss for the past and hope for the future can be so important to our ability to move forward. When that hope gets the rug pulled out from under it….well.. .suffice it to say that it can really suck. It can feel like a door is slammed in your face or that things that you didn’t even have are being taken away from you. It can be very daunting and hopefully it can progress to the point where you just change what you were hoping for in the first place. What I hoped for isn’t really an option so now I look for what can be done. There can still be moments of mourning for the ‘things that might have been’ but getting stuck there is a very dangerous thing. I have had to process the loss of so many things that it is pretty much a part of my day-to-day life. Another bad thing happens and I go “Well, that sucks. Guess I’ll fold it into the mix and on I go.” I may get beaten down sometimes but I won’t stop. And you are here. That makes you a survivor. A true fighter and warrior. You can be scared, broken, and drained but you have nothing but a long list of victories behind you (even if they don’t feel like it). There are things you can’t have or may not have but your experiences are all victories in their own way because you are still here. They didn’t break you. You survived to live another day and have given yourself the chance to find joy in new things. Even in the darkest of days, that can never be taken from you.